Magic

It’s Friday night and I am dressed to the nines. I have the most elegant dress on and prepared to go to a Friday night date with my sweet husband. He dressed in a suit. He hasn’t worn a suit in a long time. Gosh it’s nice to see him all dressed up in a suit.

We walked in to the Wedgewood on the hill. The view spectacular. It is the wedding venue that I would love to see my children married at.

I am mesmerized. It is beautiful. I am embarrassed to admit this was my first ever same-sex wedding. Surrounded by the warmest crowd I have ever been with, I walk out side to look at this amazing view. There is sweet silence between my lovely partner and myself. It is one of the many moments that I realize just how much I love him. We don’t need words in that moment to tell each other that we love each other. He holds my hand and we stand and look lovingly into each others eyes— and we say it anyway. We tell each other that we love each other. We hug and we smile at one another. There is an increased warmth, I can’t really explain it. It is just wonderful.

We make our way to our seats and we sit down. I sit next to a lovely gentleman holding his husband’s hand. I recognize him. I stumble with my words (What’s wrong we me? I talk for a living!) I say, “I know you, you’re the one with the cool shoes?” He nods, and he introduces me to his lovely husband. We joke about my wrap and how warm it looks. It is windy outside. He is wearing a gorgeous suit and the most beautiful scarf. We joke that he can share my wrap.

When the ceremony begins, the music is beautiful and loving, not your usual wedding march. I don’t recognize the music— it’s inviting and stirring. I ask if anyone brought tissue. As the Grooms walk down the aisle, I cry. I just can’t help it. Both my handsome friend and his husband and myself sniffle all through the ceremony. I listen carefully trying to remember their vows and the ceremony. I remember this: they commit to support and care for each other. They vow to be curious and kind.

They share what made them fall in love. Here is where there are lessons to be learned. They fell in love with each other because they were generous and warm. They were funny, and they made each other laugh. They fell in love with each other because they each felt that the other made them want to be a better person.

They hug their moms and their dads. You could see in action what they just professed. It was not mere words, there was action with their words. There was warmth and love and kindness at this wedding. There was laughter and joy. A celebration of two kind, gentle people vowing to share their lives and to make this world a little bit more loving and and kind. In today’s society where beauty and money dictate love and acceptance, this was the opposite— not that they were not handsome; more importantly they were kind. In a group of people who are so often ostracized, I found gentleness and acceptance as a straight, married, older woman.

Their wedding was fun and magical. What can we learn form these wonderful humans? Be kind. Look for the best in each other. Be the kind of partner you want your partner to be. Look for ways to show appreciation each day. And in the words of one of my beloved professors, “Gentleness will buy you a lot!”