Greek columns and Roman arches

Sitting at the base of the Athenian Acropolis, I see the lasting achievements of two great civilizations.

The Greeks perfected the visual appeal of the columned building, the golden ratio, and architectural optical illusion. Their columns influenced the architecture of Western Civilization. They introduced the concept of democracy to the ancient world, that persists in a modified form to this day.

The Romans created a feat of physics in their arches that engineered an empire. Many of our concepts in law originated in this time.

Both cultures’ contributions hold important places in our society today.

As a person with both adult autism and adult ADHD, I am as different from my partner as the Romans are to the Greeks. In my relationship, my contributions and view of the world— while different— are as significant and necessary as my partner’s. Not to sound too romantic, we complete and enhance each other. She sees and feels things and experiences I cannot— and I share the same with her.

The Roman empire eventually conquered the Greek lands, and here’s where the metaphor breaks down. In a relationship, neither partner should dominate the other and it’s not healthy to always be right. The relationship thrives when both partners embrace and celebrate the other’s world.

Growing up as the autistic kid, I know it’s easier said than done. Stepping out of my comfortable confines of adult autism and adult ADHD requires focus, practice, and energy. I have times where I simply do not have the energy to see the world through my partner’s eyes. These are often the moments when we struggle and experience ruptures in our relationship.

Compassion, empathy, and understanding of the other’s world can begin repair and enhance the future. Make an appointment and begin to learn how to do this in your own life.